Girlfriend Quote of the Day

I have too many friends that are gay. I can't keep 'em all straight.

Pocket Junk

So I asked Miranda if I could put my pocket junk in her purse.
She asked, "So you want to dump your junk in my trunk?" Lol

Friends with Benefits - Good Times... Drive Through

So Miranda and I are in the drive thru at good times and Miranda points to the sticker on the window that says they have a reward program called friends with benefits.

She says, "Is that because you put the meat between the buns?" lmfao

Does this make me look fat?

So Miranda asked me, "does this outfit make me look fat?" I responded, "No. That outfit fits you perfectly." She says, "I think I'm getting fat." I reply, "If you think you are getting fat, then we need to get you're ass on a treadmill and keep you away from the Twinkies and Ho-Ho's cause otherwise you aren't getting anywhere near the ding dong!"

2010 Corvette

LS9 Supercharger comes in at 710 HP!